Shop Mobile More Submit  Join Login
About Deviant jack.33/Turkey Recent Activity
Deviant for 12 Years
Needs Core Membership
Statistics 334 Deviations 4,595 Comments 54,492 Pageviews
×

Newest Deviations

gates between worlds by yesilm gates between worlds :iconyesilm:yesilm 6 2
Literature
confessions full of jack 29
If for whatever reason the sneaky snake called depression loosens up its hold on my eyes, an army of emotions rush out of the mirror. As I name and greet each of them, indignation takes over.  I curse and spit and growl and shake.
 
I did even hear it coming this time, the snake; and I did try to stop it with experience, intelligence and science. Yet, here I am: depressed, despondent, a blank canvas I have to keep painting to pass as a human being.  Nobody needs to confirm – and they have done so - I am chronically depressed. So the bottom line is even if I fight off this snake – and I will do so -there is whole pit of them nestled within my neurons waiting to emerge. Thus, indignation takes over.  I am angry because life doesn’t take it easy on one just because one harbours a pit of snakes within. I will always have to fight for serenity. Unfortunately, the irony of it doesn’t escape me…
:iconyesilm:yesilm
:iconyesilm:yesilm 0 4
Literature
confessions full of jack 28
I know have big bad confessions to make, yet no guts to make them with.
:iconyesilm:yesilm
:iconyesilm:yesilm 0 3
Literature
confessions full of jack 27
I will write, write it all down. I will chronicle every man I ever touched, every one who is a part of my personal history. I will expose the lies that accumulated and the weapons I acquired from each interaction. I will display every act of destruction, deception, manipulation, humiliation I was subjected to in the name of love and the quest for love. I am no longer ashamed, no longer afraid.  I will not sugar coat my actions, I will not understate my sins. I will strip myself naked to keep the truth untainted.
And maybe, hopefully, someone somewhere will read it and realize neither love nor the personal quest for love is an acceptable reason to annihilate souls.
:iconyesilm:yesilm
:iconyesilm:yesilm 3 6
Literature
confessions full of jack 26
I am a fire breathing dragon who is no longer afraid to scorch this distorted reality down to avenge herself and what is hers.
:iconyesilm:yesilm
:iconyesilm:yesilm 2 4
Literature
confessions full of jack 25
I got here all on my own.  No, that’s not correct. I let it happen, though. I didn’t stop the events that led me here. I turned off the screaming alarms; draped the talking mirrors, and hushed the murmurs of my heart. The instincts that kept me safely sane for years were told to calm down, to chill, to stop exaggerating.
Now that I am here, the forsaken instincts cannot be trusted any more. I am at the land of fight or flight, at the land of defensive wounds, offensive tactics, and of roars and burnt flesh. No decisions can be made until I cease to be a mere reaction to the actions of others. No decisions can be made until the mirrors start talking to me again.
Now that I am here, I have to remain here.
:iconyesilm:yesilm
:iconyesilm:yesilm 2 5
Literature
confessions full of jack 24
If the death of a tiny Betta makes me feel like I have been abandoned, and the loneliness stops echoing within my chest only to boom around the empty rooms, it can only mean I have forgotten how to truly connect with the people I claim to love. Which brings us to the actual point: Maybe I just don't know how to love.
:iconyesilm:yesilm
:iconyesilm:yesilm 1 1
My Alps by yesilm My Alps :iconyesilm:yesilm 9 8 past lives, lost loves by yesilm past lives, lost loves :iconyesilm:yesilm 17 1
Literature
confessions full of jack 23
I am getting married...
A strange arrangement of words, don't you think? My tongue thinks so.
I wanted to postpone/avoid the proposal for a little while longer. I was worried I wouldn't know how to respond. I was afraid a refusal might damage us beyond repair. I wanted to wait, I wanted to be sure. Not of him, no, he has been very clear that he wants me for an eternity and more, he has been very clear that he couldn't possibly get enough of me in one life time. I needed to be sure of myself, I needed to be sure life isn't something I merely tolerate, I wanted to be sure the idea of a long life is not something that I abhor, before getting someone else entangled in my personal wait for the end.
He asked me the question in that silent excited way of his. Right before sleep he put a ring on my finger under the covers and spoke with wide blue eyes. I said yes; matter of factly, simply, as if saying yes to a cup of coffee. There wasn't a no near by. There wasn't a single doubt. No doubt I w
:iconyesilm:yesilm
:iconyesilm:yesilm 4 6
A Semazen in Helsinki by yesilm A Semazen in Helsinki :iconyesilm:yesilm 5 0 How would you liked to be loved today? by yesilm How would you liked to be loved today? :iconyesilm:yesilm 5 2 so close, yet so far by yesilm so close, yet so far :iconyesilm:yesilm 5 2 The perfect places of Sleep. by yesilm The perfect places of Sleep. :iconyesilm:yesilm 6 6 triangle by yesilm triangle :iconyesilm:yesilm 9 2 streetgazer by yesilm streetgazer :iconyesilm:yesilm 5 2

deviantID

yesilm
jack.
Turkey

Comments


Add a Comment:
 
:iconhades-flower:
Hades-Flower Featured By Owner Nov 8, 2016
Happy Birthday! 
birthday cake Athlete-flowers.-2gif 
Reply
:iconpajunen:
Pajunen Featured By Owner Nov 8, 2016
Happy Birthday! :cake:
Reply
:iconmeralsarioglu:
MeralSarioglu Featured By Owner Nov 8, 2015
Nice yeni yaşlara :cake::iconwineplz:
Reply
(1 Reply)
:iconpajunen:
Pajunen Featured By Owner Nov 8, 2015
Happy Birthday! :cake:
Reply
(1 Reply)
:iconbemyheaven:
BemyHeaven Featured By Owner Jun 25, 2015
small heart - black  Pixel Rose Diamond 
Reply
Add a Comment: